Skip to content
Published April 1, 2017

Wank Bank is probably the only show within the Melbourne International Comedy Festival that you’re likely to walk away from with sticky, lube covered hands and a carrot in your bag. Run by the Rural Ranga, otherwise known as Adam Seymour, this show is your go-to-guide for both masturbation and partner pleasing tips – generally helpful for anyone that has the need to touch a penis in the future.

The slightly dimmed and intimate setting of the downstairs theatre at the Butterfly Club gives a touch of both excitement and nervousness – heightened by carrots and cucumbers heaped about the room, as well as the accompanying bottles of lubricant on each surface. There is nothing to fear however, and Seymour is quick to reassure the crowd that no one is going to be whipping anything out on stage tonight.


Instead we are treated to Seymour’s story of how Wank Bank came to be, living overseas and struggling with the high cost of rent, he turned to personal massages of the happier variety and built up a bank of clients which can all be viewed in an art book he created called Wank Bank. It’s through this master class that Seymour aims to pass on his techniques and guidance, spending the night gleefully demonstrating every move from one called the “Juicer” (on an unrelated note, I will be unable to ever juice an orange with a straight face again) to another so delightfully named “Rock Around the Cock.”

The success of a show such as this one is dependent upon the charismatic nature and openness of the teacher and in our case Seymour makes the evening. From the beginning of the night he is encouraging and energetic, describing his techniques with laughter inducing descriptions and gestures. There can be nothing but admiration for a performer who is able to state – with a straight and unflinching face – for every audience member to lean over and give the carrot/cucumber between our neighbour’s legs a good working to.

Side splitting hilarious and yet still quite educational – Wank Bank may be the only show at Comedy Festival this year that you leave having learned quite a bit.

 

(Wank Bank runs for the first week of show times, while Pussy Play takes over for the second, run by Seymour’s cousin – Strawberry Siren.)

Wank Bank & Pussy Play Masterclass is showing at The Butterfly Club as part of the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, from March 29th to April 9th. Tickets can be purchased here.

 

Be First to Comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *